The official peace between the Klingon Empire and the United Federation of Planets came to an abrupt end Tuesday when the Chancellor of the Klingon High Council successfully claimed a small town on the Human home world for the House of Martok.
In a radical departure from Klingon tradition, General Martok used the electoral process rather than weapons in his campaign to seize the land in New York State, a move that allowed the great warrior to avoid Federation security and win a seat on the town board in the hamlet of Ulysses. But observers should not view this peaceful takeover as any indication that the Klingons are going soft.
“There is no honor in killing Red Shirts,” growled Martok with disgust as he dipped his cup into a barrel of bloodwine, adding “And I am not a politician. But sometimes, fate plays cruel tricks on us.”
When asked why he was so bold as to target the Federation capital, Gen. Martok responded “Praxis,” which he slowly repeated again with the knowing smile of a seasoned tactician.
Praxis was the key energy production center of the Klingon Empire until a mining accident caused its destruction. The explosion of the Qo’noS moon (due to over-mining and lack of safety protocols) created an environmental disaster on the Klingon home world so devastating that the Empire had no choice but to open a dialogue with the Federation, triggering events which ultimately led to a peace agreement with its enemy.
The Chancellor explained that the High Council has been carefully monitoring the deregulation of the mining industry on Earth and determined that questionable mining practices combined with diminishing safety regulations “are not compatible with human habitation.” And Martok, son of Urthog, stands ready to claim the prize – or what’s left of it – for the greatest of the Klingon Houses.